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As a step family, it can be intimidating to assume the role of a positive influence in your family. Our 10 commandments for blended families will provide insight to help you along the way.

Mothers day

New Mom, Older Kids: Celebrating a Stepmom’s First Mother’s Day

She helps with homework, tells bedtime stories, brushes hair and plays with dolls. She does all the things every other mom does. But she only gets to do it two nights a week, every other weekend and three weeks in the summer. Stepmoms only get to live with their children part-time, but they love them full-time. The first year of step-parenting is a wonderful yet awkward time. Not only is this new mom basking in the newlywed glow, she also is bonding with her new children and learning to communicate and work with the biological mom. For stepmom’s first Mother’s Day, celebrate in a way that shows her she’s every bit a real mom.

Reschedule Mother’s Day

Little ones are likely to spend the official Mother’s Day with their biological mom. But, itMother and children baking cookies in the kitchen doesn’t matter what the calendar says. Declare your own Mother’s Day a week later and spend it creating memories and letting her bond with her new kids. Start the day with a big family breakfast and insist that she doesn’t lift a finger to help. Then send her off for an adventure with the kids; no dads required.

Not only will she have a great day celebrating motherhood, it also will help her strengthen the bonds she has worked so hard this year to form with the kids. Send them to Color Me Mine, where kids of all ages can select a piece of pottery to paint. Their creation will then be fired in a kiln to preserve the artwork. Not only will stepmom cherish the time spent laughing and creating with her tots, she will take home a precious keepsake of her first Mother’s Day.

If she would prefer a slightly less messy experience, use Spa Finder to locate and purchase a gift certificate for a nearby spa. Send mom and her daughters out for a day of pampering, complete with manicures and pedicures.

Make the Actual Day Special

Mother’s Day, spent apart for your children, can turn melancholy rather than joyful. Even if the kids are elsewhere, make the occasion special with little surprises sprinkled throughout the day. Use RedStamp to text a digital card, with a photo of her children, to her phone. Then, have FTD.com deliver Mother’s Day flowers for a cheerful touch. At the end of the day, with the biological mom’s permission, use FaceTime for a video chat with the kids. A few simple touches throughout the day will go a long way toward reminding her that she is loved and appreciated, even as she steps into the background so that the biological mom can enjoy her special day.

Keep Them Close to Her Heart

New stepmoms are often surprised by how much they miss the children when they are away. Having limited time to spend with the children you love so much is one of the hardest things about being a stepparent. For her first Mother’s Day, give her a gift that will keep the children with her, even when they are away. The Etsy shop, Stamped Evermore, specializes in necklaces stamped with the names of each child and adorned with birthstone crystals. Or, use Kidz Can Design to turn children’s drawings into a piece of sterling silver jewelry.

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