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Struggling Step-family? Let me help!
I’m a blended and stepfamily coach, specializing in helping these families learn to communicate and collaborate better than before.
Many couples find they’re fighting over little things or starting to feel tension in the relationship but they can’t find the source of the problem. Even worse, they think they know the cause and still can’t fix it. If you’re feeling this way there’s a good chance these unseen stress factors are the problem. No couple is immune.
But there’s good news. When couples understand what’s causing the tension they can work through it and overcome the negative effects it created. That’s where I can help.
Step-By-Step Coaching:
First – I help you identify the issues specific to your blended/stepfamily so that you can begin building a stronger foundation.
Next – Through coaching I show you how to work through each issue so that you can build pillars for success on top of your foundation.
Finally – Your communication and collaboration improves and you work better as a parenting team, allowing you to build bridges toward a better family.
I’m a recognized expert with the knowledge and ability to make a difference in your stepfamily.
What My Clients Are Saying:
– Bryan B.
– Jessica M.
Joel – good to see your face on your website page! Long time no see or talk – hope you are doing well !
Hey – I’m working on a project specific for stepdads and will be launch it by hopefully this fall…
Its a video series and a follow up summary notes format I’m calling, ” Gil’s Pocket Notes. ” The “NOTES” are to attend the
videos for review and additional advise that is direct, brief and a reminder of what was presented.
in the meantime – trust you are doing well – just wanted to drop you a note to let you know what is new at your end of the world!
Always Forward! Gil Stuart
Hi , looking for insight.. i have been separated ( never married) and have my 2 boys 50% of the time ( boys are 6 and 8). My relationship with their mother i would qualify as good. My GF and I have been together for almost 3 years, she has a daughter of 8 years old. We are now looking into moving into one house. Issue her daughters father. He is in and out and usually when most convenient for him or when he needs to “show off” how a good parent he is to the next girlfriend or his friends gatherings. I have no doubt the love he has for his kid, but he is more like the clueless cool uncle than a parent. Can’t for the life of him make childcare payments on time and never ( well almost never)the full amount. Not to mention, his behavior is to be disrespectful to his kid’s mother. Sure, nice guys knows everyone and would give his shirt off to anyone in need, but can’t treat or be there for his own kid. when he has his kid, she never eats properly, that is when he feeds her, she is never on bed on time be it school night or not. And when it is time to bring her back to her mothers, always late or even past bedtime. So far, I have been able to deal with it, as the impacts to me or my kids ( during my weeks) has been a bare minimum. However, if we are to live together full time,I do believe i have to tolerate a whining rotten kid because the BIO dad can’t be responsible and I certainly can not have the child waking up and disrupting an entire household when I have my kids.. I am strict and there is a routine that is followed and expected. I understand that when my gf is at her house and she is willing to accept the crap she gets when her kid comes back from her dads!! But i am not willing to be subject to this nor do i belive my kids should either.. So , can I bully the bio dad into submission or tell the gf no moving in to new house?
Eric, generally speaking, when you try to bully a bio-parent about anything, it doesn’t go well because they (we, since I am one too) often become defensive and angry. Rather than that, I’d focus on perhaps having a separate space for your girlfriend’s child when she’s with you all. In addition, perhaps a helpful philosophy would be to consider the NACHO-parenting method of David and Lori Sims (www.nachokids.com) and see if that would be useful in your situation.
Dear Joel
I hope you are well!
We have recently set up a new Blended Families Network at the firm I work for, EY (also known as Ernst & Young, in London), and would like to start hosting a few 45min – 1hr workshops or sessions/presentations for the network, specifically covering step-parenting, step-children, blended families in general and co-parenting. A presentation could cover a number of topics or just one, whatever you generally feel most comfortable and experienced talking about.
It would be great to understand if a workshop or presentation is something that you would be interesting in doing for us, and if so, what your charges would be and what your preferred topic would be.
Really looking forward to hearing from you.
Kind regards
Olivia Dunning
Hi there,
I’m Brittany and I’m a lifestyle reporter at HuffPost. Hope all is well with you!
I’m reaching out because I’m working on a story you may want to weigh in on as a stepparent. I’d be sure to link to your site and mention any relevant project/podcast/book/etc
My story is tentatively titled How Soon Is Too Soon To Become Attached To Your New Partner’s Children?
It’s news-pegged to Pete Davidson reportedly getting a tattoo that includes all of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s kids’ initials. (Davidson has been pictured with the kids recently but a few months back things were heated between him and Kanye: “West has also made it known that he doesn’t want Pete going anywhere near his children. In a series of since-deleted posts on Instagram, the Grammy-winning rapper expressed his disapproval of Pete ever meeting his kids with Kim. “As a man, I’d never get [in the] way of your children,” Pete wrote in an alleged text to Ye. “That’s a promise. How you guys [go about] raising your kids is your [business] and not mine. I do hope [one] day I can meet them and we [can] all be friends.” Ye, for his part, captioned the screenshotted text with the following: “NO YOU WILL NEVER MEET MY CHILDREN.”)
I’ll touch on the Kim/Pete story but we really want to make it more of a service piece for our readers: Something that people dating divorced parents (and the divorced parents themselves) can learn from. (It will be similar to this Parenting story that was pegged to Kim and Kanye’s co-parenting struggles but not exclusively about them: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-age-kid-allowed-social-media_l_623a0cb6e4b019fd8133b897)
Anyhow, I would love to have you contribute your take as a stepdad. If you’re interested, I would need your response sent back to me by tomorrow, Tuesday, May 2 at 3 PM PST. Short notice, I realize but your response can be brief.
Also, if you could let me know your availability in advance/before you send your answers, that would be much appreciated. (It’s helpful for me to take into account how many sources I have!)
Thanks so much for considering and please let me know if you have any questions.
1. At what point did you meet your stepkids? How did those first few “getting to know you” months go? How old were the kids at the time? Would you say you came on strong or did you try to take things slow? How did they respond?
2. What can people dating parents learn from Pete? Since Pete seems to be an extreme case, let’s generalize a little more here: How should you handle these early-on interactions with kids? How can you ensure you’re not coming on too strong? How can you get in the kids’ good graces organically rather than trying to force a connection? (Also have you seen this dynamic happen with any of your clients and people they’ve dated? If so, how did it play out with the kids?)
3. Anything else you want to add on this particular topic?
4. Name, title/occupation, site you want listed?